it's still there

wow
exams are over!!
i think this exam experience was different from previous years
i could feel the difference
God brought me through this
i know and i trust
well He spoke to me during this mini journey
it made studying a whole lot more meaningful (:

there was this example i saw from my ELL notes
MY FAITH IS ANCHORED IN CHRISTIANITY
i was like, wow!!!
then i thought: can i honestly say that i'm anchored in what i believe in?
am i really so utterly connected to God that i am anchored in my faith?
nope
i think i'm a long way from being very connected
this faith is so deep, how far have i really gone?
NOT FAR ENOUGH
there's so much more i can be for God

people always say this: "oh! you look/don't look like a Christian!"
but there's no such thing as a "Christian look"
what matters is what is inside, not what matters outside
it is what we do that makes us Christians because if we truly believe in making God the centre of our life, we would do what He wants us to do just to please Him

i read about Rehoboam
how he chose the word of people with little wisdom over that of people with wisdom and experience
God was speaking
i had asked Him previously if i was doing the right thing by listening to them
God said yes
He told me not to follow what everybody else is doing but follow what i know is right

about prayer
i remember when i first came to COSBT
i could not pray "properly"
i wanted others to teach me how to pray, what to pray
until i realised that no one could teach me and that it was between God and i
prayer isn't about saying holy things
its about telling God how you really feel and what you wnat
it is also about listening
we don't need any open sesame words to invite Him into our presence because the essence of God is all around us
praying is all about coming into His presence and giving your 100% to God
God is ready to speak to us but are we ready to listen?
God is amazing and He is living
He knows every step we should take and to know all that, we need to listen
this is one step in communication that we cannot skip
there is no standard way to pray
just as there is no standard way of looking at a Bible passage
one passage can reveal so many things to so many different people because God sees things from so many angles
we can't put His word into a box, let alone put God Himself into a box
we cannot limit what we can learn from God or we'd never be able to achieve our goal of doing our best for God

A forsaken cross You carried
My burden You took and buried
Undeserved
Still You kept going

God, why is it so soon?
I'm not ready to let go of this, not yet
I know it's Your will and Your timing
Please, it's up to You

i will wait for wednesday