a fulfilling day in many ways

I woke up at 7 today!
I think I was unconsciously preparing for school on Monday!
Great that school's starting by the way...
It's just been too long.
Okay, so I went for Kumon and was trying desperately to clear this mound of corrections before 12.
I ended up bringing more than half home as homework.
Met Peijun for discipleship and that session was a timely reminder, considering the fact that I'm going into a new environment.
It's the first time I prayed aloud and I was nervous.
I think I'm just not used to speaking aloud when it comes to this.
Haha, I had alot of practice today.
After discipleship, there was a prayer meeting for fasting.
I prayed aloud again but I was less nervous.
I guess all I needed was to give myself a chance.
Usually, I freak and end up not praying.
Hence, it doesn't matter how many opportunities and how much exposure God provides.
You can pray that He'll give you chances but if you don't take your chances, nothing's gonna materialise.
And you must always pray for courage.
Following the prayer meeting was service.
In place of the sermon, we watched a video.
"Fireproof" is seriously good.
It was so moving that we girls started crying.
The whole row minus Henson were like dabbing our eyes with tissue.
It was really sweet and touching.

WARNING: THE FOLLOWING PORTION IS ON THE EMO SIDE. YOU SHOULD NOT READ COS I'M JUST VENTING ALRIGHT? I DO NOT WISH TO AFFECT YOU IN ANY WAY SO YEAH, JUST SCROLL PAST THIS.

The video made me tear.
The memory made me cry.
During the post-video song, I just let it flow.
It's like everything rushed back to me.
Wherever, whenever, it seems like something just triggers the memory.
Hate it when that happens because I just want to move on.
I willed myself to stop but I guess God didn't want me to stop till later on.
I don't want to forget but I don't want to be stuck in the past.
I don't know why it haunts me when there wasn't a deep connection.
It could be because I saw her suffering.
I wish I could have suffered in her place.
Nope, not being suicidal or sadistic or whatever.
I just wish she had gone peacefully.
I realise that this has been a more emotional period for me.
Perhaps it's because I have more time to let my mind run wild.
I think that I've grown more comfortable talking about it now though.
Thanks to God and encouraging people around me.
But I really wonder when it'll stop.

IT IS NOW SAFE TO CONTINUE READING.

We went to Joshua's house after service.
His house is near to the flat land that used to be my house.
Aw man...
His house is nice...
I'm the only one who's never been there.
We ate, watched TV and discussed travel plans.
May not be able to go even though its during the holidays. :(
I doubt my mum would allow that, seriously.
Anyway, before eating dinner, I got a call from Siew Yee.
I was the last to get to the table and therefore, the one to say grace.
Yes, Siew Yee, that's your fault, haha...
Never mind, it's EXPOSURE for me. :)
Had dinner and left with Peijun and Sze Ern.
Thanks for escorting me to the bus-stop!
Hmm, miracles of miracles, I didn't get scolded as much as I thought I would be.
Thank God for that... :)

I'm going to sleep now.
Goodabye and God bless.

JAE

JAE Posting was revealed today!
I received mine at 6AM...
Congratulations everyone! and all the best! :]]

Thank God I got what I wanted!
I had no plans whatsoever for a scenario that I didn't get what I wanted.
That was not becuase I was overly confident but because I honestly did not want to think too much about it.
Less stress that way (I'm in no urgent need of that)
Worrying is equivalent to not trusting God.
I realised that lots of people are coming to CJC now!
AJC'S and ACJC'S COP went downnnn....
Good luck to the S4 batch of 2009!
All my wonderful juniors, please work hard! :]

I'm working on the application essay for the ELES.
It was hard enough to churn out a page.
Imagine being told that half of it should be cut out because it's too repetitive.
Thank God I have until 20th Feb to edit, edit and edit.

My ideal combination: Maths, Chem, Econs and ELL
I'm still unsure of whether or not I can take this combination but I hope I can!
I mean, it makes no sense to only offer ELL to arts stream students.
That would look (and be) totally biased.
I just hope the website was just being unclear...



I have to let God do the planning
He'll guide me as I'm walking
Until He reveals, I won't see
But I know He has a plan for me

the day we got lost in lot one

Okay, I know LotOne isn't that big but my mum and I got a little lost.

LOST PART ONE:
Our adventure started off with Mum wanting to find the postbox.
We couldn't find it.
We walked around the bus interchange and in and out of LotOne.
We still couldn't find it.
We gave up and decided to get something to eat.

LOST PART TWO:
Mum said she had FoodJunction vouchers.
Then we began our quest to find FoodJunction.
We were going up the escalator from the first floor when Mum said that food is usually at the basement.
Went to the basement.
Couldn't find it there.
Went up and up and up.
Still couldn't find it.
We were beginning to think that there wasn't a FoodJunction there at all and that the voucher was outdated.
Then, we found it after going in circles.

THE CRAZY THINGS WE FIND IN FOODCOURT FOOD:
After exploring the foodcourt, we decided on murtabak.
We sat down to eat.
Halfway through the meal, Mum found something in the murtabak
A CHICKEN BONE!
She actually tapped it not-so-gently to verify that it was a bone.
I'm not a murtabak-eater by nature but I'm pretty sure murtabaks DO NOT have chicken bones in them.
We were annoyed and left.
Please don't let this unfortunate encounter stop you from eating from that stall.
In my opinion, it was the chicken's fault for being too bony.

OTHER STUFF:
Having not eaten Famous Amos cookies in a long time and having had an unsatisfactory lunch, we bought Famous Amos cookies.
I also bought the StepUp 2 VCD and watched it.
It's very good for killing time.
Enjoyed some of the dance routines even though I've watched them before.

HIGHLIGHT OF THE DAY:
I learned how to upload photos!
Okay, this may seem basic but it's not.
Now, I understand why people say uploading photos is tiring.
But yay, triumph! :]

Oh, tomorrow is the posting results release!
The SMS is coming in at 8AM!
Hopefully, there'll be people I know going into the same JC as I am...
Hope everyone gets what they want! :]

CNY'09

The Lunar New Year is about:
- Coming together as a family and catching up with each others' lives
- Cleaning up your room
- Eating to your heart's content (dieting can wait)
- Replenishing our financial reserves
- Renewing New Year resolutions (you get a second chance, how great is that?!)
- Reminiscing about last year and how you've changed

This year's celebration was more low-key for me compared to previous years.
The reunion dinner on my dad's side was held 2 weeks in advance.
We had to hold it earlier because we were going to eat out.
That got off to a bumpy start but it was alright.
The reunion dinner on my mum's side was on the eve of Chinese New Year.
We had steamboat!
I got to see my cousins so that was pretty cool too.
The 3 of us went into my grandma's room and started taking photos.

from left to right: yanling.alex.yanting

That was pretty fun, we haven't done that since the chalet 2 months back!
Day One of CNY started off slow...
Hehe actually we only had a dinner party to get to that night.
But before that, I learned a very important lesson: DO NOT PROCRASTINATE. PLAN EARLY.
Okay, the dinner party was awesome as usual!
The food was great.
I got to catch up with my aunt so yeah, awesome!
I ended the day by collapsing on my bed.
Day Two was more eventful.
Went to Grandma's to have lunch.
Before that, I underwent an origami crash-course by my 7 year old cousin.
After lunch, I watched some TV before helping another cousin with her math.
And I was enjoying it.
Went home and my family and I were eating Mac's when two other cousins and my uncle showed up.
Okay, that basically ends my Chinese New Year.

This Chinese New Year had a new meaning for me.
It was open-door season!
I would never have thought of this festive season as an opportunity to spread the Gospel.
I think the greatest thing about going to a new place is when you gain new perspective.
Going to COSBT is just about the most life-changing experience for me.
I'm not kidding nor am I exaggerating.
People think: "But you've been a Christian your whole life! How much difference can there be?"
That's so wrong.
Talking about living the life of a Christian and actually living the life of a Christian is so different.
I used to think I was living it but after joining COSBT, I realised that I wasn't.
To have God speak to you is amazing and to have Him use you for a purpose is beyond incredible.
I'm so glad that my relationship with God has been brought to a whole new level through this new environment.
It's here that I feel His presence strongly. :]
A big thank-you to Nissi GAP members for your encouragement and care!
God has blessed me with good influences all around as well.

Too grateful that words alone cannot express.





No one really gets over death but God fills up the vacant space left behind...

my first post

Oh wow, still can't believe I just created a blog.
I'm gonna have to try harder to maintain this one.
JC life will be starting soon: in approximately 4 1/2 days!
I'm excited because it's not only the start of a new journey but it's also the end of all the boredom.
Honestly, after 2 months of intense fun, doing all the things I was previously deprived of (eg. sleep) I got bored of doing them.
Luckily, I began a spiritual journey in December or I'd be worse off.
I wouldn't say I resumed my journey because I feel like I've actually back-tracked in some way.
In short, the journey so far has been awesome and I just know it's gonna get better!
I'm getting to know new people so yeah, pretty great!
Major credit goes to my aunt (age 19, in case you thought otherwise) for bringing me to the church!
Oh and not to forget the wonderful cellgroup family for making me feel so welcome!
Just got back actually from hanging out
Met Luwei, Shuen and Bryan for lunch afterwhich we hung out at Luwei's place for awhile.
After Shuen left for school, we went to CoffeeBean to stone
I left the guys to continue stoning because I had to go home.
I also realised that my appetite for meals has been decreasing.
Could be all the New Year goodies though...
Speaking of New Year, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
Belated but oh well, better late than never.
Hmmm...
I was wondering if taking a 2sci2arts combi is a good idea.
I heard the schedule's pretty, well, all-over-the-place-ish.
The person who described it to me made it sound like the poly kind of schedule.
Oh well, what's the worse that could happen right?
Hmmm, though I was praying for opportunities during the open-door season and all, there weren't any.
Or maybe I didn't see them...
At any rate, I hope the others are having more opportunities.
And I realised that when i pray for deeper understanding of His Word, I began to understand the passages better.
Told you my journey's getting better!
One day, it dawned on me that I was actually really uncomfortable with showing some things in my life, even though they was inspired by God.
Then God prompted me to step out of my comfort zone.
Oddly, I actually felt so much better!
Awesome or what?! :)
Goes to show we can always trust Him yes?