My Life Support System

Verse:
When I'm weary and breathless
And I'm just about to collapse
You breathe into me strength to carry on

Frustrated with many things on my mind
I need to leave all that's passed behind
In You I find the peace that drives me further

Pre-Chorus:
All I'll ever need
So much more than I can be
Where would I be without You
Jesus You saved me

Chorus:
Because of You
I can smile and stay strong
Because of You
I held on so long
And I know no matter how broken
I can count on You to be
My life support system

Verse:
Breaking chains that hold me back
Picking up the pieces again
Your hope has me standing stronger than before

Always there answering my heart's call
Always there to catch me when I fall
Your love picks me up and takes me higher

Pre-Chorus

Chorus



I need some time to think
I have to sort out emotions and thoughts and that's never easy
It's on my mind still
But I know I've given it to God
There's always that amazing peace that comes with that
I've stopped worrying
3 times You've spoken so clearly
This proves that You are listening
I prayed for that impact
Even if it all doesn't reach people, I know it reached me
Your presence means so much and I thought I'd lost it for a while
Now I know that You were just waiting for the right time
I admit that I doubted.
But now I know that Your timing is really impeccable
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You give and take away

Because Of You

Verse:
Tried to fly and not rely on Your strength
Something caught and crippled my wings
Cried out I can't do it without You here
Next moment You lifted me up

Bridge:
Kneeling before You in brokenness
Your presence drains away my emptiness
There's no one as amazing as You

Chorus:
Because of You
I can stand firm again
Because of You
I'm not beaten by pain
Because of You
I can stay strong each day
And I know I'll be okay
Everything's gonna be alright
Because You're here by my side

Verse:
Relied on things existing on earth
And upon their abandonment
I presented You my empty cup
Next moment You filled me up

Bridge

Chorus

Verse:
Chose to go against Your way
Climbed high on my pedestal again
But then I fell and needed help
Next moment You picked me up

Bridge

Chorus

I Need You

With me through every fight
Your awesomeness words can't describe
God, Your love is all I need

I need You, Lord
Teach me to let it all go
And allow You to take full control
I need You more
I need You like never before
I need You to carry me through the storm

Lord, stay with me
Fill my whole being
God, hold me close
Never let me go
I want You to know
I love You with all my soul

Take me away on Your wings
With You, my soul will sing
Your love surpasses all things

i need You, Lord
Teach me to let it all go
And allow You to take full control
I need You more
I need You like never before
I need You to carry me through the storm

Lord, stay with me
Fill my whole being
God, hold me close
Never let me go
I want You to know
I love You with all my soul

You're amazing God
You're all I want
You're all I need
To make me complete

music

I realise that I'm really starting to pay attention to the lyrics of songs.
now it's not just about the tune, it's more of the lyrics.
haha and I realised that timo plus shuen singing is actually pretty nice to listen to.
guess i didn't really pay much attention previously.
and nowadays the songs randomly pop into my head.
oh and I hope you can see the video.
It's the song 'Indescribable' by Chris Tomlin


yes, I finally figured out how to do it.
and yes, I'm aware that I'm not very technology savvy lol.
but yes, success!
haha enjoy the video!
and if you like it, thank God I was able to upload the video here (:

hoho elections for the swimteam exco are on wednesday.
I don't really want a position.
there are things that are more important to me.
I guess the swimteam is important to me.
it's just the authority and title that doesn't really matter to me.
I believe you can impact people even if you aren't in a position.
those who know me when I was in secondary school know that I cared more about my juniors than the position.
I'm not so selfless or anything.
it's just a matter of what my priorities are.
right now, I think everyone has a pretty good idea what my number one priority is.
it's all subjective but my top few priorities will never change.

I just want to get well.
but I'm not going to struggle over this.
I'm just going to trust in God.
2 messages that touched me alot:
"Alex.Listen to me.I need you to cast your burden on God.
In all that you do,do it for His name and you'll recover.
Trust and faith."
followed by
"When bad stuff befalls,many people just blame on faith that God isn't good and neglect the good side of God.
That's not fair to Him.We must always appreciate what may come our way so smile and stay strong.You'll recover."
I love this person.
Thank you so much(:
I love the other person with the same name as well <3
you both are amazing.
and like 2 wonderful older sisters to me
funny how it is that God made it such that you both came into my life, one after another.
and how the two of you are such a major part of my life now.
I can't believe how much God has blessed me.
God, thank you so much for Angela Chia and Angela Teo
Who am I that God should choose to bless me?
I used to sing this song all the time.
I think it says it all.

Who am I?
That the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt

Who am I?
That the bright and morning star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wondering heart.

Not because of who I am.
But because of what You've done.
Not because of what I've done.
But because of who You are.

Chorus:
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord You catch me when I'm falling
And You told me who I am
I am Yours. I am Yours.

Who am I?
That the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again

Who am I?
That the voice that calm the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

Not because of who I am
But because what of You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are.

Chorus:
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord You catch me when I'm falling
And You told me who I am
I am Yours.

Not because of who I am.
But because of what You've done.
Not because of what I've done.
But because of who You are.

Chorus:
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind.
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord You catch me when I'm falling
You told me who I am.
I am Yours. I am Yours.

Whom shall I fear?
Whom shall I fear?
'Cuz I am Yours

[Who Am I by Casting Crowns]

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord Blessed be Your name

indescribable

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NqMYHmoXMAQ

after repeated tries, I still couldn't upload that video onto this site.
somebody enlighten me on how I can do this.
BUT
the lyrics are here!
INDESCRIBABLE BY CHRIS TOMLIN

From the highest of heights to the depths of the sea
Creation's revealing Your majesty
From the colors of fall to the fragrance of spring
Every creature unique in the song that it sings

All exclaiming

Indescribable, uncontainable
You placed the stars in the sky and You know them by name.
You are amazing God
All powerful, untameable
Awestruck we fall to our knees as we humbly proclaim
You are amazing God

Who has told every lightning bolt where it should go
Or seen heavenly storehouses laden with snow
Who imagined the sun and gives source to its light
Yet conceals it to bring us the coolness of night

None can fathom

Indescribable, uncontainable
You placed the stars in the sky and You know them by name
You are amazing God
All powerful, untameable
Awestruck we fall to our knees as we humbly proclaim
You are amazing God
You are amazing God

Indescribable, uncontainable
You placed the stars in the sky and You know them by name
You are amazing God
All powerful, untameable
Awestruck we fall to our knees as we humbly proclaim
You are amazing God

Indescribable, uncontainable
You placed the stars in the sky and You know them by name.
You are amazing God
Incomparable, unchangeable
You see the depths of my heart and You love me the same
You are amazing God
You are amazing God

this is the song that I was talking about in the last post
the lyrics are pretty awesome (:

This is part of the song 'Counting On God':

Joy unspeakable that won't go away
And just enough strength to live for today
Cos I never have to worry what tomorrow will bring
Cos my faith is on solid rock
I'm counting on God

and I need Him so much
where would I be without Him
I know I stand here today as a testimony of Your grace

an empty core

fear clogs my heart.
it's not from God.
and that's why I need to cast it all out.
with fear comes negativity.
with negativity comes a certain holding back to worship.
that's not the way man.
I really long to just leave it in God's hands.
I did let go for that couple of hours yesterday and it felt so good.
now I just gotta pray that it doesn't linger in my heart.
all the worry and fear has gotta leave.
I don't want to be distracted from what's most important to me.
I realize that the more disturbed and troubled I get, the more I push away the people I love.
again, that's not the way.
yesterday's peace reminded me how awesome it is to feel His presence.

on a more positive note: somehow, I was very open to Him this morning and He spoke very clearly to me.
the key message: never let anything hold you back.
considering my condition, those are the exact words I need to focus on.
a question I asked myself following His prompting:
"Am I praying that I'll get well so that I can glorify His name or so that I can glorify myself?"
glory is something we fight for but who we attribute it to matters.

and I think I'm not angry with God.
I think I'm angry with myself.
for some reason.
I didn't really ask "Why me?".
it's odd and somehow I haven't figured that out yet but I have a month to think.
the cellgroup had praise and worship yesterday and we sang this song called 'Where the love lasts forever":

Your mercy found me
Upon the broken road
And lifted me beyond my failing

Into Your glory
My sin and shame dissolved
And now forever Yours I'll stand

In love never to end
To call you more than Lord
Glorious friend

So I throw my life upon all that You are
Cos I know You gave it all for me
And when all else fades
My soul will dance with You
Where the love lasts forever

And forever I will sing
Lord forever I will sing
Of how You gave Your life away
Just to save me
Lord You saved me

I tell you I was seriously thinking about it
and at first, the reality of it all didn't sink in
then I started to really mean what I was singing
I guess that's what I really love about Christian songs.
they make you think if you really mean what you're saying
and they're all pretty beautiful lyrics
there's this other song that I heard and thought the lyrics were awesome
that's how I want mine to be: to be able to impact and provoke the worshippers to think about what they're singing
and of course truly mean every single word



I keep asking so many times
Where are You in my life
I fault You once things go wrong
That's not how I wanna be anymore

I wanna rely on You more
I want to trust You like never before
I need You in my life
Lord, come and flood my life
I need to feel You more
Lord, come and fill my very core

I always end up with nowhere to turn
Why don't I ever seem to learn
That nothing on earth ever stays the same
I'm struggling to sustain this faith

I keep praying for my heart's desires
I keep praying You'd fulfill my dreams
Never thought about anyone else but me
Now I want to know what Your plan might be

thank you for the prayers
you don't know how much I needed them
all that struggling drained me
but I really thank God that you guys are here for me
even to those among us who had no idea what was happening to me
just the overall presence made such a difference
thank God for all of you
[peijun,szern,bryan,shuen,bel,timo,luwei,henson,joshua,ewan,victor,roger,pingguang]

change (:

hotmail is lagging so badly.
or maybe i'm just being my old impatient self.
speaking of old self:
(to those of you who've known me for a while)
have i changed??
according to someone who shall remain unnamed for the time being, i've changed over the span of a few months.
but so many things have changed.
my environment has changed from swiss to CJC
my church has changed from GPC to COSBT
my circle of friends has expanded to include people from CJC
i now have a cellgroup.
love my brothers and sisters in Christ (:
too many things have changed.
now all i have to do is to convince people that it's change they can believe in.
whoops, i stole President Obama's line.
(in reference to my family issues)

mm maybe being the youngest isn't a good thing.
because people think that when you're the youngest, you should be shielded from lots of things.
but when you're eventually exposed to it all, you get a greater shock.
enlightenment from watching myself, my younger brother, younger cousins, etc.
people think you don't know stuff.
but you do.
and that makes you wanna shout so badly:
"I DO UNDERSTAND!!!"
but these things just take time.
for people to realise and for you to realise how much more responsible you gotta be.
i wish it'd just hurry up but then again, God's time, not mine.
oh man, i think i sound in too much of a hurry to grow up.
must be the height issues lol.
(in reference to my own problem)

i don't know if it's really you.
or just me.
but i'm hoping it's a gift.
in reference to my relationship with God that has seemed to be taking an interesting turn.new angles.

mm and love bites man.
love, no matter what kind, hurts in some way or another.
either we hurt others, others hurt us, or vice versa.
praypraypray.
i just want things to be like before, know what i mean?
unfortunately, nothing ever stays the same.
and you learn to deal with it.
all the same, past behind us, let's move on.
the more we dwell, the longer the hurt will last.
oh this sounds like i'm in a BGR.
please take note that i'm not.
don't assume man, cos when you assume, you're probably wrong.
particularly in this case lol.
in reference to my family issues again
you don't wanna know.

on a totally different note: my econs sucks.
really, it does.
i'm so struggling.
floundering rather.
too many tests.
and too many essays.
as you read, i should be doing my work.
mm yet i'm here.
why?
because i feel that my brain's gotten stuck.
or maybe it's lagging like hotmail.
on the flipside, i know of some people i can always count on.
thank God.
erm yeahhh i think you know what this is about (:

all consuming everlasting
God almighty Lord of Glory